My Word of the Year (2016)
When I first saw the whole “word for your year” trend start a couple years ago, I honestly thought it was pretty dumb. I have always been a resolutions type of girl and simply picking a word seemed to brush off the importance of a new year and the fresh start that came with it.
Today, the first Monday of 2016, I’m sitting down to apologize to everyone who I directed a snarky thought towards when I saw they were picking a word for their year. I’m sorry I thought snarky things about you and your word. I have thought about your way of approaching the new year and am ready to accept I was wrong. For someone who was all about resolutions, I sure stunk at keeping them for longer than a month. I’m ready to change how I approach this new year and so, I’m going to adopt a single word for my mantra of 2016 and see how it goes.
My 2015 was not terrible, but it is safe to say that it was not what I expected it to be at all. It definitely wasn’t my favorite year. It was a year of moves (3 to be exact, and two of them across the country) and it was a year of being without a home base for several months. It was a year of uncertainty as Dustin transitioned from a student to an intern, to a sales rep, and finally to a financial advisor. It was a year of mental and emotional exhaustion as I struggled so hard with my survivor’s guilt and as my anxiety grew to a new, all-time high. I often felt crippled by an anxious weight pressing down on me and would be reduced to tears as my thoughts ran wild at what terrible things might be waiting for me. I truly felt that at some point in 2015, in the midst of so much change and uncertainty, I had lost myself. Even though I had so many good things going for me (like a supportive husband and my blog) I just couldn’t stand on my own two feet without feeling like the world was sliding around. My anxiety defined my 2015.
I will not let it rule my 2016.
I’ve made several changes in my life recently, both medically and mentally and I finally feel like I have a grasp on myself again. Over the last few weeks, I feel like I’ve been emerging from a fog that I had been lost in for many months. I’ve been hit with a ton of inspiration and suddenly have a clear vision on what I want to achieve with this space and with my life. And I’m determined to not let my anxiety or my trepidation get in my way.
In 2016, I will be fearless.
I will not sit in my home, afraid to go grocery shopping because of car accidents. I will not be afraid to experiment in the kitchen because my food might taste yucky. I will not refuse to take Rosie for a walk because I’m afraid of someone trying to abduct me. I will not look over my shoulder for my cancer coming back for me.
Most importantly, I will NOT be afraid of what others may think of my blog, my business or my goals. During the first year of blogging, I would often get discouraged when my real life friends would unfollow me on Instagram or say rather passive aggressive or discouraging things towards my blog. I would be afraid to post something because of what another blogger might say behind my back. I would spend days ignoring my blog because of my anxiety of failing and disappointing my husband. I was constantly afraid of myself and of others and it was dragging me down.
But not this year! I will be fearless!
I made myself an iPhone wallpaper and a desktop wallpaper to help me keep my word with me at all times (shout out to Ashley for the idea). I’m not a graphic designer by any means, but if you want to join me in my pursuit of being fearless this year and want a reminder, you can download these backgrounds for free!
I’m excited to see how having a word helps me face this year. I feel like I might be more successful with this one word than I ever have been with my resolutions.
2016, you will not scare me. I will be fearless. I will make changes. I will take risks.
I will pursue the things that set my soul on fire.
Do you have a word for this new year? Even if you don’t, what is a word that inspires you?